Welcome everyone to the fourth installment of the Gamel Funny Farm Blog.
What you'll find below are random conversations and hilarious moments I've had with my family over the last few months. Our boys, Christian (10) and Jackson (6), are witty and have amazing comedic timing. On top of that, my wife, Leslie, and I are 10 percent normal and 90 percent goofy.
When you add it all up, you have the Gamel Funny Farm.
You can probably imagine that as a writer, I am never at a loss for inspiration thanks to these goofballs. For everyone's convenience, I have included links to the previous three installments. You can read Vol. 1 here, Vol. 2 here, and Vol. 3 here.
I hope you enjoy this latest installment.
Me: (balancing the checkbook) "What's this random $4 withdrawal?" Leslie: "Oh, it was so I didn't have to use the debit card at that random concession stand." Me: (eye roll). Leslie: "Would you really have wanted me to use credit?" Jackson: "Sign up for Credit Karma. It's free."
Leslie: (as she types up an email) "Steve, can you spell 'immediately' for me?" Me: "Why don't we try and spell it together? How do you think it's spelled?" Leslie: "I'll just say 'right away.'"
Jackson: "Daddy, let's play like we live in a castle. We can name [our dog] Roxy the royal mutt." Daddy: "OK. So Daddy is the King, Mommy is the Queen, you want to be Lord Jackson, and I guess Christian is the Prince." Christian: "Uggh. A Prince?" Daddy: "The Prince is the heir to the throne, silly!" Christian: "Hey, I'm not AIR." Daddy: "Seriously?" Mommy: "My King. He clearly doesn't know what heir means." Daddy: "Oh, Lord." Jackson: "What?"
Christian: (during the World Series) "Wouldn't it be great if [George] Springer hit a home run right now?" Me: "We definitely need it." (Two seconds later, Springer hits a homer) Me: "IT'S GONE!!!! YOU CALLED THAT!!!!!" Christian: "How did I do that?!?!?!"
Jackson: (To the lady in the carpool lane as he's getting out of the car) "Hey! The Astros won the World Series!"
Me: "You are so sensitive. You should be able to tell after 16 years when I am kidding and when I'm serious." Leslie: "Oh geez, Steve! Why don't you just make me a flowchart!"
Jackson: "Daddy, I love you, but I want Mommy to wake me up in the mornings."
Sitting down to help my 10-year-old with his math homework. I'm worried I won't know the answers. I'm just a writer, dang it! #outofmyelement
Christian: "Did you know one time after you beat me in Mortal Kombat that I got so mad I went and hid in Jackson's closet?" Me: "What? I didn't know that, but I'm really sorry. That's why I don't like playing against you in video games. I don't want to hurt your feelings." Christian: "It's OK. I just didn't know what losing was." Me: "Well, now you do!" Christian: "Whatever! So, you wanna play me in MLB The Show?"
Jackson: "Daddy! I want to go to Olive's Steakhouse." Me: "What in the world is Olive's Steakhouse?" Mommy: "I think he means Outback Steakhouse." Jackson: "It's a restaurant where they have steak and olives."
Mommy: "How was your STUCO meeting!?" Christian: "Good." Mommy: "What did y'all talk about?" Christian: "Can't tell ya. Top secret."
Leslie: (while at Nebraska Furniture Mart) "Ya know, the furniture is nice, but it's just not expensive enough."
Me: ???????????????????????????????????
My wife makes the best lunch packs! #madewithlove
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